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Words of Wisdom ...or so it seems...


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Tuesday 31 March 2009

Yeaa baybee...I've lost my Mowjow.....

It seems that most of my articles regarding medical stuff incidentally ends up with not the magic three words "I lust/love/loathe you" but three lettered words, s.e.x. What can I say except, hey, sex sells...I mean, ask some of the powerhouse entertainment divas, like Madonna and Britney. If they were to look like a Burger King quarter pounder cheese burger, trust me, Madonna would still be singing about feeling like a virgin, even though her body language in that gondola suggested otherwise, and no one would bother if anyone can see whether Britney is ovulating just by looking underneath her short skirts without that underwear, which by the way is not mission impossible. Besides, who wants to read about "Identifying the pathogens in Acute Gastroentritis"

I mean,if you were to possess buttocks that can instantly change the underwear for the pregnant into a thong, obviously no paparazzi will be tailing you around (can't say the same about Japanese paparazzi though..I hear some of their readers have fetishes....). Basically, sex sells, and stars like Madonna and Britney knows how to "stay on top", by applying this sexual illusions.(sorry, can't help it if I'm puny...or puky to some).

Admit it, even you won't bother reading about them then. I mean, don't need to go far. In Malaysia,(with the exception of Mawi,of which I feel somebody should come up with marketing research for this piece of puzzle) if you are good looking, sexy and fun, you'd go far in our local entertainment biz. Having actual talent would be a bonus indeed.

I just remembered my point, there I go again, going on a tangent. I meant to talk about men's sexual health in connection to riding a bicycle. I'm quite sure it's every man's dream to ride on anything that ticks them, but like women, bicycles too have an agenda of their own.

To be the man is to have his vitality intact, it's the essence of a man apparently. I mean, look at some great names in history that flaunts their manhood - Alfred Hitchcock, Chula-long-corn, DICK Cheney, Shakespeare, MP from Batang Ai, Alexandre Dumas,wait, asses don't count, dumb or otherwise, sorry, my bad. I think you get the point of how important it is a man's sexual health is to him.

Unfortunately, cycling tends to limit men's whatchamacallit, mojo?. (yyeaaaaa baybeey). In fact, they should use the word "mojo" to substitute the "love life" in the title of the article I posted below, because to some, sex and love may have totally separate meaning, (just like, let me see...maybe the certain political party when they screw their own kind in general, by not realizing the consequences of their actions, or in-actions for that matter; nothing personal really, just screw them all for self gain by abusing the NEP, absolutely no feelings involved). Here, read these articles yourself. (No, not regarding umno porn, that one takes a book and a nothing to loose author).
Serious riders, your bicycle may effect you love life
And here's another;
Bicycle Riding

I'm no big fan of "orang tua tua kata", but I suppose the saying "naik basikal lama lama nanti senak", actually did have some truth in it. I use to wonder what "senak" actually meant, well, now I know. It's a kind of an innuendo, you know, the kind used by, say, God when He told us "Adam and Eve ate the forbidden fruit", when we all no they ate more than just fruits that day...
(Below lies the stuff men and women would like to know, but to shy to ask..)

Currently, as we are speaking, (well,perhaps after they've watched the World Cup 2010 qualifying rounds), scientists are designing the ultimate bicycle seat to enable people like Lance Armstrong ( I wonder if "arms" meant "weapons"?...just a thought...if so, then I would like to rest my case regarding men's name with relation to their manhood), to feel that that broken collar bone is the least of his problem.

Basically, it's to do with the bicycle seat design. Click HERE, to read about a research done by scientists, regarding the the hazards of cycling too long and what is the latest method of improving those seats. Click HERE for the abstract, if you're too lazy to read the whole works.

Turned out, Journal of Sexual Medicine, via research, concluded that the standard protruding nose extended seat design of most bikes in the world had adverse effects on the sexual desires of the one using it.( Honey, when you cut off the blood supply to an organ that needs lots of it to function, how can it not dysfunction, no need harlot mathematician to figure that one out . And I thought the natural vibrations from the bumpy ride is good for the sexual stress for us women.(Hey,I said 'stress' not 'health' pay attention please). I wonder if that was the reason for a police man on a bicycle to be grumpy, either from the genital pain or from the lack of sex as the consequence of the bicycle seats. These clinical trials will resume, until they find the ultimate answer to solve the problem. The good news is however. one thing almost for sure, sexual health departments never run short of volunteers for their clinical trials,paid or unpaid.

I use to cycle on road about 40kms down in Hulu Langat during the weekends. I was the only gal amongst a whole bunch of guys who, even when they know that I'm in the health line, odd enough, never complain about any incidence of "failure to launch" (and I'm not talking about their expensive bicycles). Then again we only cycle less than 100km per week, less than the 3 hours mark. We usually broke our journeys somewhere in between to lepak at the nasi lemak stall in Sg. Chongkak, on the pretext of Carbo loading. So I guess that gave "us" a breather.

A word of caution about Carbo loading though. You only need to carbo load if you're cycling more than 100kms at one go, and when you carbo load throughout the week, make sure you unload that carbohydrate otherwise you'll be Carbo Loaded!! And if you keep that up, the loaded carbohydrate will show on the tummy circumference, next thing you know, you may misdiagnose the inability to visualize an erection as impotent. By the way, be careful when you cycle the Hulu Langat circuit. It's a well known venue for dumping dead bodies. The weekends observes busier traffic, ergo it is safer.

Just in case it escaped your minds, we women too experience the same effect as men, when they have their pedundal arteries pressured by the bicycle seats, (albeit that was not the reason why I stopped cycling, in case someone out there gets funny ideas) but since we are not the gender expected to "rise to the occasion" during a performance, no one would know really, except the particular woman herself. Yes, some women too have problems with erectile dysfunction - how NOT to instigate it in our spouses, when we've had a long day, and I don't mean long in an anatomical sense of it, and the last thing we need is and active mind and an sexually active spouse. If only the scientists can come up with a remote control with a simple "Mommy and Daddy button" as that would really be convenient for the busy women to schedule sex. Speaking of "long" that's one thing I cannot comprehend. Men's race towards a longer penis. It's not like a woman's G spot lies all the way up in her umbilicus. Obviously the cream that claim capable of elongating a male's love cannon is not only pointless, but they bloody don't work too. Most likely you'd end up bearing the cost for the barrel repair instead....

Ah well, if all else fails, there's that wonder pill Viagra. They've even improved the pill's performance by the birth of Chialis. Chialis can make an erection lasts longer, another thing which I cannot decipher...the part where someone needs to get an erection for over a long time. Apart from being a porn artist, or a gigolo, a rapist perhaps, and of course old man who can still get excited without self hazard, what other category of men are there that have all that time for sex?

Women too have our pink pill, but not as establish as the blue brothers. But by the time women lost their interest in sex, they would have been in their pre-menopausal age, of which incidentally, would cause generalized dryness (which explain the dry humour), including the vagina, and they would most likely be prescribed the estrogen cream to combat the vaginal dryness. And this cream, just like the blue pill that was created for other intentions but showed "hard" evidence of assisting penile erection, makes women horny. It's a dream cream. No, not for women, but for their spouses!! I've had patients' husbands thanking me for prescribing that cream to their wives !!

Three cautions though; One, women should not use this cream during intercourse, because the estrogen may be absorbed by the male counter part via contact and men can develop breasts from the estrogen. Then this heterosexual couple may end up having the same confusion as gays probably may have, "who's was it? Was it yours or was it mine? It was too dark honey".....

Secondly, for single women approaching menopause, who gives a shit about a dry vagina anyway, it may as well obliterate like any other part of the underutilized organs,unless of course, you want to "take matters into your own hands", or unless of course, you don't care about the consequence of being stone to death (absence of "d" is with purpose) for fornicating, (ah well, better laid then never), use this cream with caution, as the cancer risk for a woman who have not bore any child is higher than that of a woman who did and this brings me to ; thirdly, and more importantly, long term utilization of the estrogen cream may cause cancer.

As for men, you need to be very extra careful when you consume the pills especially when you have been diagnosed with a heart condition, and the mere thought of excitement can potentially be something not to die for, rather something to die from, as these pills can actually plunge you into a cardiac attack and you may "die hard".

What is the take home message again? Two things men need to be careful when they ride em, women, especially those using the magic cream (with everyone else too), and of course, a bicycle with a nose. It's not worthwhile for men to get a heart disease, because, even Viagra can't help you then.... As for women who regard sex as something they enjoy less than the money coming from their husbands, don't tell your husbands about this article, just get them a conventional bicycle for their birthdays....
(rabbit hole, minus the magic cream, ends here)
...Click here to find out how deep the rabbit hole goes.....

Saturday 28 March 2009

My Earth Hour

Prologue:

It's Earth Hour, and before anyone shun me, this notebook is running on batteries. It's 3 more minutes to go before 9.30pm and soon the lights will be on one by one. I happen to be working tonight, (part time - jalan jalan cari makan) and is paid by the hour. The owner of the clinic, is doing the Smeagol. The Earth Hour poster was posted on the clinic glass door since about a week, but when it comes to money, I guess, people start doubting their loyalty to mother earth.

First she said, switch of all lights, then she said if the patients come by, switch on the light, then the next phone call came, she decided to let the light stay on. By this time, she had succeeded in getting onto my nerves. So I told her, that I'd have my one hour's pay be cut off provided she switch off all lights, and I will see the patients who would are not sick, just dumb enough to wait in the dark to get their , I dunno,pimples treated, when the lights get back on. Of course I'd respond to any emergency cases, err, actual emergency by world standard and not the posh kind of emergency where they wail because they broke their darn nails. To my surprise, or dismay rather, she quickly agreed!! Money always wins it seems.
...............................................................

Anyway, I went back to my house, just within the vicinity and observed the darkness, the moment I drove away from the commercial area. It seems that money is more important than say, making a statement in saving the earth. I wonder where they plan to spend all that money, when the world ends before the prophesied dooms day, in Mars?

As I drove home at precisely 8.32pm, I noticed our clinic was amongst the few shops with the lights cut off. I even told the girls to cut off the lights of the sign board, talk about being overzealous. Unfortunately, the mamak stall was packed with, oh my god, my own people, the proclaimed Khalifahs of the world. It looked like the Puteri UMNO gathering, (which was rather queer since I hardly see them out of the concubine really) with women clad in clothes that ensures they cover what their mama gave them plus the tudung. I dig them. I know why they are not bothered to show support and join the earth hour. I reckon they would have figured that the earth is on it's impending path towards doomsday as scheduled anyway, why bother saving it right? These people obviously did not learn the history of the dinosaur....the extinction part. Didn't those dinosaurs extincted long before dooms day?

Well, we can't pin point our fingers really, to people who do not support the Earth Hour. Most Malaysians don't even bother abiding to the law, what more if it's a mere request for a voluntary action....

Anyway, the scene away from the commercial area was mixed, most lights were out, probably because the occupants were out in that mamak stall, who knows, but it was a beautiful sight to see most of the houses were in darkness. Didn't see any suspicious looking character by the way. No thieves tonight, I wonder if they are having their candles off too.

First there was darkness..........
Then, there shall be light........
Perfect would have been if we were to exchange ghost stories, but my family is one of those bunch who do not believe in ghosts, so we decided to talk about the recent UMNO general assembly instead. Trust me, it's even spookier.......

It got really hilarious until I almost peed, which made me curse myself for forgetting to pee earlier, instead have to scramble my way around in the dark with a candle looking for the bathroom.
By this time it was halfway through and we got bored. So we decided to have a competition, and see who looks spookier in the dark.....Maya Karin would have lost that role in Pontianak Harum Sundal Malam, should we submit this to Suhaimi Baba....(gee.....that explains the smart movies she makes....she's got to B.A qualification)
Contestant #1

Contestant #2Contestant #3 pulled out last minute due to unforeseen circumstances, no, not the Wall Street screw up....some other thing...
AND THE WINNER GOES TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMUAAAHHHHAAAHHHAAAHHAAAAAAAAA....WELLCOME TO EARTHHHHHHHH HOURRRRRRRRRRRRR.........

Friday 27 March 2009

My photoshop work progress.........

Here's something I'm learning to abuse. Currently I'm learning how to edit pictures, self taught, as you will obviously see once your eyes gets a feast upon the result. I know I'm suppose to download the software for it, but since I have a bloody long line of stuff to do until I get to it, I figured, what the heck, I'll just show you my progress.

It started off when I saw this pic;
Then I thought, oh well, why not..................
I could have sworn I did a great job, until I saw this......
(Click below to see the masterpiece)




Obviously I have a looooooooong way to go........Have a grrrrrreat weekend everyone!! Enjoy the World Cup qualifying matches!!!

(rabbit hole ends here)
...Click here to find out how deep the rabbit hole goes.....

Tuesday 24 March 2009

Get the rapists you morons.....

In this age and time, when mother nature is seeking vengeance via green house effect, rendering a Smart Tunnel not smart enough to remain open during the mere threat of a flash flood, reports in the newspapers regarding women being raped hardly raises many eyebrows anymore. Sure she was discovered hanged from a tree with only her briefs before being raped and murdered, but hey, that's part of life right?

Well, it is this kind of thinking (although I beg to differ,one can't possibly be thinking when they say such things),of treating a rape case as though it is a norm is what makes this crime subsist, and become one of the oldest crime committed. What's the oldest crime then, you asked me? I can't say prostitution, as in some parts of the world, prostitution seem to have been legalized, ergo you can't call an act of crime. Besides, at the rate of the economy slowdown, it may be worthwhile to look into imposing tax unto the sex workers to generate revenue and enhance the existing eco-no-money ( I'm quite sure they make more money than say, our local doctors working in the government sector, not to mention having more sex a day what a doctor gets in a year. No, it's a mis-presentation that mini series Gray's Anatomy, I hope no children pick doctor as their career of choice blinded by these illusions. The only version of Dr Mc Dreamies are the persistently droopy eyed, sleep deprived ,malnourished, underpaid overworked least interested in sex looking male doctors who sometimes may look like their drug addict patients themselves....).

And if someone were to disagree saying tax money from sex workers is "haram money", tell them that taxpayers get screwed all the time, and we pay through our asses whether the service be with or without a smile, stop using the infrastructures then. Besides, I think prostitutes, shoving aside the ethical and moral aspect of it, are unquestionably smarter than the random fornicators and adulterers. To put one at risk for STDs via sexual intercourse, and the risk of breaking up a marriage, one might as well make money out of it, rather than philandering for free.

Furthermore, in Islam, if proven to be fornicators, you get the cane anyway, whether you charge for that sex or otherwise. You'd probably need the extra cash to pay up for the ever rising cost of hospitalization after the caning. In some parts of the world (although it is hard to believe that they are part of the world), stoning fornicators to death is the punishment, which is a bit weird since Allah (I'm Muslim, I get to flaunt the "A" word, hah!!), although allow Qisas (eye for an eye),however, encourages forgiveness. Why would Allah who encourages humans to preserve life that He considers as sacred, by encouraging forgiveness towards a murderer by the family's victim, refuse to portray the same degree of forgiveness towards adulterers/fornicators? Does this mean, it is better to kill than to fornicate? The claim of stoning people to death therefore, doesn't make sense does it? Oops... sorry for I have digressed, that happens naturally the moment one turns 40.

Back on track, furthermore, since there are people who don't see money politics as a form of bribery, and there are people getting off money politics merely by a "stern warning", sending a message to the public that the act of screwing people for money is condoned, why be biased and prohibit prostitution? Might as well legalized this profession and then tax them to help generate the bullish economy. At least those whores we can tax.

Exactly what am I rambling about? Oh well, I'm sure everyone have read "Rape victim found hanged from durian tree".

I have been summoned to court a couple of times to testify as medical officer in a few rape cases, of which the victims were children below the age of 12years old, raped by adults they trusted.
I psyched these rape victims (and their parents) who were under my medical care to comprehend that it was NOT THEIR FAULT that they were raped because most of the time they were made to believe it was, and I encouraged their parents to prosecute. I loathe attending court cases involving rape cases though. It's really ugly. And that's just describing how the court handled their proceedings.

By the time the court presided, I had already been transferred halfway across Semenanjung Malaysia to another hospital. The time taken from the day the rape was reported, to the time the case gets called to court was just about ample for any gravid mother of 10's vagina that had undergone spontaneous vaginal delivery, to become re-virginated. And I have not touched upon the time taken from the incident of rape to the time the victim had enough guts to come forward to report the crime.

One of the victim was first raped by her maternal uncle at the age of 9 years old and was repeatedly raped thereon until she realized that, at age 12, no other friends of hers had gotten the "conjugal visits" from a non imaginary friend. I know. It makes you want to shove a durian up the rapist's ass. Now that is an interesting form of punishment the legal department should consider to be inflicted upon rapists.

Then I get asked dumb questions like "Is it possible that the rapist rape the victim standing?". And mind you I have to answer the question in Bahasa Malaysia Baku describing how sex is possible performed standing, (yukh!!) when all the time, I wanted to scream out at their faces "haven't you tried screwing your wives standing?". But I guess it was pointless anyway, since that particular lawyer looked like his eyesight can't get past his belly to view his own erection, let alone imagine having sex standing.

And don't let me start on how many times the cases were canceled and the people in charge had forgotten to inform me beforehand. When I thought about how much money the taxpayers' could have saved from unnecessary transportation of witnesses to court only to find the case was postponed because the bloody police officer in charge or the court clerk had forgotten to inform regarding cancellation beforehand, it makes me want to tell them off.....oh wait, I did.... But that is another story..

Yes, to a medical officer, a rape case is emotionally taxing and frustrating, but it is nothing compared to what the rape victims had to go through. Can one imagine the magnitude of their suffering and what court proceeding delays may mean to them? I doubt it, unless you become a victim yourself.
.

(Click below to find out more about rape victims and Nik Aziz...huh? Precisely why you should click below)


It is not my intention to be erudite, but as far as my experience in testifying in court as a medical examiner in a couple of rape cases takes me, it is through my observation that rape victims have to prove their innocence not just in the court room, who may prove to be more empathic towards them. The prosecution extends beyond the court room and towards a more scrutinizing society. It is no wonder that not many rape victims are willing to come forward to report the unfortunate incidences. The repercussions of what may seem as merely claiming justice is far more grave when society be the judge of the people's court, especially when the people lack awareness. Some never did came forth ergo they suffer in silence. The public is partly responsible for this.

It is when the influential people like Nik Aziz who make reckless statements claiming the reason why women were raped was the utilization of perfume and lipstick, that make society's mind deviate from the real task, which is to punish the rapist, not the raped. It is this kind of statements that make me wonder, if the old man is senile, or just plain obtuse.

I doubt that he has ever sat and actually spoken to any rape victims his entire life and that his perception of the whole matter is a manifestation of parochial and pedantic line of thinking. Because if he did, he would notice that there are children of age prepuberty, that are also being raped, even as I'm writing this. No, lipsticks, no perfume, not even secondary sexual characteristics like breasts or hips, or even buttocks, and what have they done to deserve being raped? If he did, he would notice that it took those rape victims a lot of mental trauma to overcome society's dogma to avow the fact they they were actually being raped. If he did, he would notice that when someone forces sex upon a woman, or a man ( but I doubt men would come forward to complain , although there were cases that did. If I'm a man though, I would zip it and consider being raped as another type of fetish and try to make the most of it...), she suffers a form of emotional, physical and mental abuse that would scar her for life. If he did, he would realize that by saying what he had said, publicly, he had helped the rapists feel justified of committing the crime. It's like saying, she deserves to be robbed because she did not lock the door. If society is not diseased with theft, (there are such places even though it is hard for Malaysians to imagine it at present moment), one can leave the door open without getting robbed.

I categorize individuals such as Nik Aziz, as "he who knows not but thinks he knows it all", he can change his name from Nik to Dick for all I care. Either that or he belong to the "he who knows not but is pressured to portray he knows it all". Either or, he definitely is a "know not". It infuriates me to think that a person who sermons religion could come up with insensitive and unfounded remarks. The act of rape itself is a crime, with or without lipsticks and perfume. If he cannot grasp this simple concept, it makes one wonders how he grasp the concept of Islam as a whole. It's giving me the goose bumps even as I am typing this.

Society must be able to appreciate the fact that, even if a woman lures a man to have sex with him,that sex should stop the moment the word "No" is uttered. It is not fair to say "she deserves to be raped", because, no one, deserves to have crime committed upon them. And that is what rape is, a crime, regardless of the events or excuses leading to it.

As though adding salt to injury, (which by the way is a ruptured vagina accompanied by cuts and bruising all over the body, and that is just the physical trauma seen by the naked eye) in some states, the auta-rities are planning to follow the Arabic Islamic practices, which is to make the rape victims come up with four witnesses in order for the rape claim be valid. In case it escaped any one's minds, someone ought to remind them, that it is almost impossible to come up with 4 reliable witnesses during a "tangkap basah" modus operandi, involving couples celebrating fornication and adultery. ( sometimes, it is quite unfair that the infant gets to enjoy their infancy yet adults gets punished for adultery) . Would it be possible for a woman terrified for he own life be able to come up with these four witnesses? Or do they think that the rapist would pounce on his victim in crowded places full of potential witnesses?

Furthermore, why stop at rape cases in coming up with these witnesses? Why not produce 4 witnesses to prove robbery, murder, sodomy(there goes CSI out of a job, no need to parade semen stained mattresses in and out of court), internet crimes, bribery (oh wait, it's probably implemented for bribery, judging by it's rampant practice especially amongst corrupted politicians - obviously it is difficult to have 4 witnesses to a bribery case, that explains it then), why stop at sexual crimes ?

Oh sure, at least we don't stone our rape victims to death because they have failed to produce the four witnesses, we are slightly smarter than those morons in the middle east, but I'm sure given half the chance under the "Hudud Law", (you know, the one that is still struggling to get past the draft because the mullas are trying hard to figure out how to implement something that even Allah haven't mentioned at all in the Quran), the eastern disciples may just decide to follow these morons, making one wonder, who's the Dumb and who's the Dumber.....

You can't kill someone just because you think he deserves to die. That is not up to any living being with a functioning gray matter to decide. Rape is not sex by provocation. Rape is about manipulation and power display upon victims during sex. Rapists do not rape rampantly, they choose their victims. They may prefer children than a perfumed adult. More than anything else, rape is a crime, and it should not happen even when "provoked".

Society have got to decipher this, and stop victimizing the victims, instead, punish the rapists severely. Have more empathy on the victims, not the victor. Should a society is unable to grasp this simple concept, contented to accept rape cases a norm ingredient in life, then the raping will never end. What is more distressing, is that it can happen to you or the people you love. Need this be the turning point to one's life in order for him to open up his eyes to realize that society is wrong in the way they treat rape victims?

To end something I intended to be a quick comment that somewhat ended up a verbiage, it is vital to reiterate that society should not be nonchalant or tolerable towards any form of crime. Rape is a crime, and it is important for us to get this fact through our skulls. Otherwise, whilst we're still debating on was it the perfume or the lipstick that got women into this mess, the rapists out there are having a rape-fest. Should we fail to recognize our priorities, expect more than durians to fall off our durian tree in time to come.
(the rabbit hole ends here, phew!!)
...Click here to find out how deep the rabbit hole goes.....

Wednesday 18 March 2009

The Redang Rendezvous.....yes,...again....

It's time of the year....yes, again. I had to finish my leave that cannot be carried forward beyond March. 15 days of annual leave and I still have balance leave and was forced to finish it. I know, what a gripping life I lead.....

Anyway, I plan to make it an annual event, finishing my leave in Redang. Can't help it. I just love being there mainly because, there is a balance between reasonably edible meals, good package deal, a prerogative between quiet and noisy, comfortable accommodation with friendly and helpful staff.


We spent 3 nights and 4 days at the Long Beach just enough before we start feeling like wanting to strangle each other or I start talking to myself, which, incidentally, I do elsewhere anyway.


Global warming saw early March waves lashing out onto the beach front. I reckon by mid March the water would have been calmer and perhaps later from April to August, Nemo and friends may pay the seaside a visit, mainly out of curiosity of why humans bother to wear swim suits or their whole freaking clothes in the waters.

Before reaching Redang, we did take some, what I feel as interesting snap shots around Kuala Terengganu. Although KT has it's Floating Mosque, Floating Seafood Restaurant (just adjacent to the Shah Bandar Jetty), I am not going to show you it's latest addition, the Floating Toilets. I think Public Toilets in Malaysia deserve a topic of it's own, less perennial rather more peri-anal problem really.

Below:
The White Mosque, obviously. Actually, the real name is Masjid Zainal Abidin, but people started calling it Masjid Putih, because frankly, who cares who Zainal Abidin is...I like the building because of it's all white, and it looks devine with that backdrop of clear blue skies, with a tinge of gray to tease us of the possibility of an incoming rain
Below: So you think it is a hut eh? Actually, it's Hut's on wheels, run by engine, generally called the public bus.
And of course we had to torture the Penarik Beca. Wait. Torture is when you weigh slightly lighter than a whale and decide to go on the beca.
P. Ramlee would not have bothered getting involved with an unavailably rich aristocratic woman in his movie Penarik Beca, had he this beca inbuilt playback entertainment.
Honestly, for a moment,I fell in love with Jeffry Din, singing and prancing away like he normally does when he sings. It must have been the unpolluted air, they do strange things to your brains.
(Click below to see more of Redang)

The last time we went to Redang, we went trekking from Pasir Panjang to a private beach, that turned out to be the property of Berjaya Hotel. It's a little bay adjacent to that that held a majestic looking Berjaya Hotel. To us it's called trekking, but the kampung people who work at the numerous resorts in Pasir Panjang, it's their highway to work, minus Samy's toll.

We trekked for about 20-30minutes, quite ridiculous to get lost with all the red markings on the trees to indicate the right path. I would call it an easy trek, well, depends, if your Body Mass Index (BMI) be more than 30kg/m, then perhaps it may rank between a moderate to a difficult trek.

Below: Taking a breather and more clean air into the system, engorging eccentricity due to overload of oxygen in the gray matter.

Below:
Finally, after spending time worrying about becoming a Tiger's "sup tulang" (hey, we're skinny due to our genes), we saw the lining of sandy beach, a sight that made all that sweating and anxiety of being eaten alive by some beast, worth it. Unlike the humans, the beasts don't have a specific meal time like breakfast, brunch and so forth, so we can't plan to trek in between the meal time......
If you're looking for hot babes in mini thongs and cheeky giggles, the trek is not worth it. But if you're looking for a piece of heavenly sightings, you've come to the right place.



And the water is so clear, you could even see the viral warts on your toes !!

We had to climb over some rocks to get over to the Berjaya Hotel. Well, my daughter always wanted to go for rock climbing. I told her that trek gave us all, trekking, swimming , lazing around, rock climbing and boating ( we went back by Berjaya speedboat since my daughter was post viral and did not have the energy to trek back)

On Pasir Panjang, there's no TV, radio, handphone transmission (except at the beach) and you're forced to relax and enjoy the environment, until of course, some joker gets drunk and decided that he could sing "I did it my way" better than Frank Sinatra (of course, he's drunk!!!) merely by using the karaoke sound system. That was why I picked an accomodation, slightly further from "civilization". Below - a view from our hut. We spent much time on it's balcony facing the beach, reading.
And when our butts get sore from the sitting on our asses, we do our reading on the beach chair instead, although it doesn't really help the coccyx much, being tough wood and all.


Occasionally, we get little visitors, of which we welcome more than our fellow homosapiens, with talents to sing ergo posing threat to our tympanic membranes. (in laymen terms, the eardrums)
At least THIS visitor has other talent....although humans can do lots of things with a pole, pole dancing included, we still can't eat with our body hanging upside down a pole. Check this out people....HAH!!
Other activities?
Let me see, there's trying not to drown; (below)
More eating;
Checking out asses;

All the way till the sun slides into the skyline...........when there's only the sound of waves to keep you accompany, until the bloody drankard started singing again......What is it about karaokes, drunkards and that bloody song "I did it my way" anyway?!!!!
Then you fall asleep without realising when, from the tiredness of not doing anything the whole day, and wake up bright and cheerful eager to repeat the whole process of not doing anything another day.

Occasionally, your eyes will be feasted upon what may seem like true love.........Of course, love isn't love until a couple wear the matching swimming gear.......

(Post ends here)
...Click here to find out how deep the rabbit hole goes.....

Friday 6 March 2009

Those Infidel Vitamins !!!

My nurse almost died yesterday. No, she was not having a cardiac event or anything of the sort. She almost died rolling onto floor laughing out loud or better known on the net as ROFLOL. Of course I asked her why. She told me that a patient came by to ask for a multivitamin. "So?" I was beginning to think that too much of patients' information is getting to her sanity. The she answered, "she ask if the vitamin is halal or not". I was the least amused. My reaction was more of the WTF kind. (like "whhhhaaaaa' the fffffff.........ish"?!!). Not the same reaction from the good laugh I had when I read thefatwa story. Ironically, both emotions were instigated by religious sources. They say religion is no laughing matter. Agreed. Some of the "followers" however,are hilarious though.

Click here for the contents of multivitamins, and tell me which part can be considered as haram?
(click below to answer that question boggling your mind)

I reckon it's likely the lecithin ingredient whereby can be derived from animal or vegetable sources. Obviously the animal sources that is causing all the hoo haas.

As usual, I would go refer back to the words of God when in doubt.
In surah An-Nahl Ayah 115 (16:115) God said,

[115] He has only forbidden you dead meat, and blood, and the flesh of swine and any (food) over which the name of other than Allah has been invoked. But if one is forced by necessity, without willful disobedience, nor transgressing due limits, then Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.

And He added;

[116] But say not - for any false thing that your tongues may put forth - "This is lawful, and this is forbidden," so as to ascribe false things to Allah. For those who ascribe false things to Allah, will never prosper.

And for those who like to use the "Halal" brand to manipulate Muslim market, God has a message for thee;

[117] (In such falsehood) is but a paltry profit; but they will have a most grievous Penalty.

It was not until later that Science unfolded the reason behind the ban to the meat of pig. I think almost everyone would have known by now the nematods parasiting the pork. For those who have patience for knowledge, ple click the link below to learn about the Trichinosis
Here's the description, copied and pasted.

"The life cycle of T. spiralis includes several different stages. The adult trichina lives in the intestinal lining of such meat-eating animals as swine, bears, walrus, and rodents. After mating, the male worm dies while the female goes on to produce the offspring. (imagine what happens if men dies after sex!!!)
Roundworms have a stage of development called the embryonic stage, which in many species occurs after birth. In trichinae, however, this embryonic stage occurs within the uterus of the female, so the offspring that are ultimately discharged into the host's intestinal lining are in the larval second stage of life. These larvae—about 1500 from each female worm—travel through the circulatory system to the heart, then through the blood vessels leading to striated muscle (the muscle of the skeletal system and the heart). Most larvae that cannot find suitable locations in striated muscle will die.
Those larvae that reach striated muscle will grow to a length of about one millimeter, coil themselves, and enclose themselves within a protective wall called a cyst. This process is referred to as encysting. The worms in the cysts can live for up to ten years in this form."

"Most lavae that cannot find suitable locations in striated muscle will die". A surge of comprehension dawned unto me as I read these words. How precise God had been when He mentioned "the flesh of swine". He did not say "the swine", "the bones of swine" or "the skin of swine". Just "the flesh of swine". Simple straight forward message, even an imbecile can understand. He even added, "But say not - for any false thing that your tongues may put forth - "This is lawful, and this is forbidden," so as to ascribe false things to Allah. For those who ascribe false things to Allah, will never prosper." followed by warning for those who intend to manipulate His words for profit making.

In An-Nisaa' (4:28), God had said;
" Allah doth wish to lighten your (difficulties): for man was created weak (in flesh)."

God need not burden us with anything for men loves to complicate the uncomplicated and in doing so, impose burden unto themselves.


So where did all this "Haram this Haram that" came from? Frankly, I don't give a damn.........All that matters to me is the words of God, because time after time, only the words of God stand true. Obviously He knew what we mere mortals are not only capable of complicating the uncomplicated, but we somehow are fond of doing it for whatever agenda. That was why God was specific in his commands. Still, to err is human.

God said in Surah Ta Ha Ayah 2-3

[2] We have not sent down the Qur-an to thee to be (an occasion) for thy distress,

[3] But only as an admonition to those who fear (Allah).


...Click here to find out how deep the rabbit hole goes.....

Wednesday 4 March 2009

The rain in Spain stays mainly in the plains....but in KL...

Here's a surprise I found in Star Online this morning. You know, the I-already-know-but-I-have-to-pretend-that-I'm-surprised-anyway kind of surprise applicable to birthday "surprises". Past 40 you either don't remember your birthday, or you remember to try very hard to forget it. Either way you can't surprise anyone above 40 with birthday arrangements. This is what I'm talking about actually.

"Thousands caught unawares as 2m-high flash floods hit KL". Okay, I am not going to comment on the grammatical error of this Star Online Headline, as mine is not all that great either, because I am after all the product of the Malaysian Education System, although I'm not one of those Nationalistic Chauvinist who'd insist my kids should learn everything in Bahasa Malaysia and refuse to acknowledge that half of Bahasa Malaysia terms are derived from foreign language especially English.

It was my fault because I prayed very hard for the rain to go away from my destination, which was PJ. The sky looked like it was going to fall from KL all the way to PJ at about 4.30pm yesterday. All I did was sing in my prayers "Rain rain go away, come again another day, old Shari's got to work and not play. Please God, make the rain go away". I reached PJ half an hour later and it rained for a bit. Next thing you know, I went out of the clinic half hour later and the sky looked paler than before. That was when I knew ....I was THE ONE....

Okay, jokes aside. What can anyone say about the flash floods in KL? The solution, which happened to be a multimillion ringgit project came out with the Smart Tunnel, unfortunately not smart enough to stay opened during flash flood. It's not like we share the same weather as Saudi Arabia, here check out how much rain Malaysia Kuala Lumpur gets by CLICKING HERE . I don't think there will be any solution for this. The politicians are still busy fighting amongst themselves. It's like the dogs fighting over one particular tree to pee onto, to mark their territory. Disgraceful really. They can't sort themselves up, how on earth are they going to sort the rain...

There will be more of this flash floods folks, "Sediakan bot sebelum hujan" ,the new millenium pepatah Melayu. But the next time it flash floods in KL, act surprised..............and the next day, when it is reported in the local newspaper...act surprised again. That way you get to keep your blood pressure at a relatively normal range.