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Tuesday 7 September 2010

Rantings of a Migraine Victim

Just a quick bitching session before I settle for a more relax holiday and festive mode. I have got to get this out of my system. Right now, I am having a massive headache. You see, I live what Malays would say "sepelaung" (a shout away) from the mosque. Puuhleeeez don't ask me how that happened. Enough to say that I made the bed, now I have to lay on it. Well, technically, it wasn't me who made the bed, but I would prefer not to sound ungrateful as to have been blessed with my own house, by not nullifying that with grumbling about it's geography. I have a feeling that God is having fun and is laughing at me right now. But hey, it's okay, we have a good bond, one that allows teasing each other...

Why the massive headache? Well,first and foremost, I don't live in New York, and Ground Zero is as far and away as my taste for Dangdut and Techno music. So, it's got nothing to do with the hoo haas going on about the erection of a Mosque (in a non allegorical viagra-ed sense of it)on Ground Zero. What hoo haas? Well, this post is not about that but hey, I'll just throw a few links or two just for old time's sake...

HERE. HERE. HERE is the response from the Christians. HERE is a conspiracy theory on who is masterminding this politicizing of the mosque to build on ground zero.

Below, is a video that depicts the opinion of my favourite artist, who, makes more sense than all the religions and politician put together...



I would like to say though, I find it ironic that a hell occupant (based on the measurement of Muslim autarities that people involved in music are sinner, and of course, being an infidel and all, apparently there is no hope for people like John Legend) shows more empathy and compassion towards other peoples' beliefs, more than what I can say about the majority of Muslims throughout the world.

Then again, John Legend does not stay in my area to listen to the live broadcasting of the activities going on in the mosque via the microphone and loudspeakers after the Azan was called. He, like me with the massive headache right now, would probably if not most likely agree with what I'm about to say in my letter (spiteful not to mention anonymous love Epistle to the Mosque committee...)

" Dear occupants of heaven, I know that everyone is eager to convert the whole world if not the whole universe to Islam (although I'm not sure if the aliens are circumsizable and it would be odd to have an eggnogged headed green creatures with huge almond like eyes change their name from Kriptoc to Fakhim or Fakhme) but I have some bad news for you.

First and foremost, energy in the form of sound do not get absorbed into one's "sanubari" ergo, blasting the beautiful words of Allah does not turn anyone more righteous or fall suddenly madly in love with Islam. Not understanding Arabic does not help either. Instead, the energy will vibrate, and shake the mass of the human body (unfortunately not in beneficial way to the women kind...then again who cares about women right?), especially the gray matter which in turn makes them have suicidal thoughts, not planned unto themselves, but instead, on the Imam who screams through the microphone every single time they are given the chance, in a manner of Teoh Beng Hock allegedly self strangled himself, then jump out of the building and dragged himself around to cause imprints of the earth on those shoes, AND later on write the suicide note. Obviously, the Imam must have gotten carried away with the term "Rock the mic". Just as a surgeon should not be caught uttering the words "Oops", or "Don't worry, this is my first time in the Operation Theatre too", an Imam should not be caught "rocking the mic". It's very seditious if you ask me.

I don't mind the Azan to call for prayer, although Muslims claim that the Hindus make so much noise when calling the disciples for prayer, yet is it okay when we do it 5 times a day? It makes me wonder on what grounds do the Muslims have to see it nuisance the same practice when non Muslims execute it, yet fail to see it as a annoyance to others when we do it 5 times fold. Then again, the reminders to prayers such as the watch, the phone with the reminder, even the hotel staff who do wake up calls are all infidel in origin. So I suppose, azan makes more sense than using infidel products. That is why I'm totally against the use of China made counter to count our zikir. Duuuh....why do you think God created fingers? All 20 of them (finger foot included). But I digress.

You cannot blame some of us who are unable to appreciate your effort to Islamize us, not when some of us work shifts and it is difficult to experience enlightenment, when one is devoid of sleep for the last 48 hours and is unable to do so because your voice, which incidentally sounds muffled, and incoherent through the walls (actually it sounds like that song, "blah..blah..blah") interfering with the zen of sleep. Furthermore, I don't think the babies nor their parents would experience enlightenment when the baby cries at the shock of the tone coming out of the loud speaker.

Some of us have migraine attacks and that is One Malaysia headache in the sense that just like any 3 out of 5 Malaysians on the road, that do not have regards for timing.

Besides, if we really want to join you, we know where the mosque is. You make it impossible for us not to notice, with some of the car parked recklessly so as to serve as the people who test other people's patience on behalf of God.

Furthermore, there is no compulsion in Islam,

[Yusufali 2:256] Let there be no compulsion in religion: Truth stands out clear from Error: whoever rejects evil and believes in Allah hath grasped the most trustworthy hand-hold, that never breaks. And Allah heareth and knoweth all things.

so technically, you cannot force us to listen to anything. I suppose, because of that, and some of the reasons I've stated above, God, the Compassionate and knoweth all things,have clearly said in 17:110

قُلِ ادْعُوا اللَّهَ أَوِ ادْعُوا الرَّحْمَٰنَ ۖ أَيًّا مَا تَدْعُوا فَلَهُ الْأَسْمَاءُ الْحُسْنَىٰ ۚ وَلَا تَجْهَرْ بِصَلَاتِكَ وَلَا تُخَافِتْ بِهَا وَابْتَغِ بَيْنَ ذَٰلِكَ سَبِيلًا

[Yusufali 17:110] Say: "Call upon Allah, or call upon Rahman: by whatever name ye call upon Him, (it is well): for to Him belong the Most Beautiful Names. Neither speak thy Prayer aloud, nor speak it in a low tone, but seek a middle course between."

So technically, you may want to juggle around with the Equal Loudness Contour so as to keep the Hertz just enough to attract the interested human attention and not that of our pets...I don't think it's a good idea to have them at the mosque. Some of the neighbourhood cats are having more sex than the human occupants around the neighbourhood put together. I'm sure by now you are quite familiar with their booty calls. Perhaps it is not a very good idea to have fornicators and god knows if some of them are adulterers. It's a bit difficult to aim at a cat to stone it to death if you ask me.

Thank you for your attention and time taken to peruse my sighs.

Yours Sincerely,

- Migraine Patient -

2 comments:

Cruzeiro said...

LOL
Any chance of a "polis repot" coming this way?

Monyet King said...

an apple a day keeps ibrahim ali away ?