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Tuesday 19 June 2007

My Series of Unfortunate Events

Ever had one of those weird days that you thought you would only read on the LAT cartoon strips?

Today morning, I threw the house key to my daughter, only to have it thrown overboard, and it ended up on the rooftop. My golf pro frequently reminded me to control my power shots, and I think I am beginning to see why. We had to get a ladder to save the key and the house owner,namely me, from distress. I was a little uncomfortable having to show off my bottom to my neighbours across the road. I hope it will not impose distress in their marriages. You know how jealous insecure some wives can get. I begin to wonder,as I ran my hands around to try and locate the keys, whether it was my weird lifestyle of showing off my sacred assets that made two of my former neighbour shift? Hmmmm.......And, of course,distress because I was already late for work. You know how it is. It's life, pulling a prank on you. You're late, and something almost always happen to delay things up even futher, making you from a just a teeny weeny late, to "oh f...k me I am bloody mother late". Not that swearing will ever turn the whole situation around, but I suppose, it did release my brain tension, probably prolonged my lifespan by 5mins (who's to know anyway )

Breakfast then. Stood there while waiting for the mamak to cook my order, which was roti canai. ( I don't practice what I preach by the way , who can eat oats every morning, yukh!!). Back to the mamak now. I was staring at the roti in the making, my mind was in Shrek's Land of Far Far Away.It's a habit that I have. I remember my specialist teasing me, "sharifah, staring at the patients private part is not going to bring his blood pressure up". This was during training, and I remember I answered,"that's because it's just a the manequin".

Again, back to the mamak who by now, thought I was awed by his roti canai making skills. That was when he decided to show off. He swung the roti high up in the air, just like the maneuver we see in the roti canai contest. The sudden change of gesture perked me back to the present , just in time to catch him gazing up the ceiling, by now, trying to look like it was the ceiling's fault that the roti canai never landed back on his hands. I was torn between which event was funnier, the whole roti canai lost in twilight zone bit, or the expression on his face. He wore this expression, which was more like, the boo boo he did was part of the whole act, whereby the roti was suppose to get stuck there and fall down an hour later.

I, on the other hand, was trying my best not to embarass him even more, which was quite a difficult task. We never did exchange so much as a smile after that. I paid for my takeaway breakfast, just dying to get to a spot where I could release at least a giggle.

It's now lunch time. I have yet another 11 hours to witness any more weird events, so that I could declare today, as the day of series of unfortunately events....Hopefully, if ever they occur, they will be funny rather than spooky.

1 comment:

Hazidi said...

On mornings like these, I strongly recommend you looking up the syringe they use on horses. It would be fun if you have one too. Imagine the horror in your patient's eyes when you pull it out and pretend to prepare to inject them with it.